Every second Friday my husband Peter and I escape from our house so that Lucy can come in and clean. What destination could be better than Paris? No, not That Paris – the other one. The one about an hour’s drive from Toronto.

In the fall, I enrolled in a University of Toronto architecture course that covered heritage buildings in small towns of southern Ontario. We studied different architectural styles and periods. Several of them are represented in Paris. We decided to go exploring.

As we drove there, Peter asked about the name. Were we going to see a copycat Eifel Tower? In fact the name comes from something far less sophisticated: one of the town’s natural resources – plaster of Paris! Tons of gypsum, which was originally found in France, is now mined along the banks of the two rivers, the Nith and the Grand, which converge in the centre of this small Ontario town. So no Eifel Tower, no Louvre, no Notre Dame cathedral. But lots of other interesting architecture to see.

Our first discovery walk was into Lower Town where several landmark cobblestone buildings are still standing. Levi Boughton, one of the early settlers, arrived from England in 1838, armed with first-hand knowledge of cobblestone construction. When he found the perfect stones along the banks of the two rivers, he was in heaven.

A close look at the construction of these places – a church and several private residences – shows that building them was labour-intensive for sure. Cobblestones, we learned, are about the size of a fist; bigger than pebbles and smaller than boulders. Each smooth round cobblestone was carried up from the riverbanks and painstakingly placed in neat rows of gypsum/plaster. They have withstood the ravages of Ontario weather for years.

Then we walked along the Grand River to Upper Town, the city centre. The original hotel, the Bradford built in the 1850’s, is still in use today, renamed the Arlington. Just up the street is the Romanesque-style Presbyterian Church built in 1893. The wheel window, ornate brickwork, round towers and terra cotta detail are hard to ignore. The town library, paid for by Andrew Carnegie in 1904, conforms to his specifications of a stately front entrance with an imposing staircase. Unfortunately this building was not accessible, so the original entrance has been blocked off, and the main entrance is now around the corner at street level.

As you would guess, the mansions are located in Upper Town too, along an aptly named street: Grand River St. These homes were originally built by the town’s wealthiest and most influential citizens. Norman Hamilton, who made his millions from a distillery and a pork-packing business, designed one of the earliest stately homes, a beautiful Regency “cottage,” Hamilton Place, in 1884. Even for such a large structure, he chose cobblestones.

Other large homes have been repurposed to suit the needs of modern Paris residents. Captain Peter Cox, a military man from England, built an ornate Italian Villa on Grand River Street. It’s now a funeral home. Hiram Capron, known as the town’s founder, built a huge mansion on the banks of the Grand in 1887. It was later purchased and extensively renovated by John Penman who also built a huge business out of men’s underwear. This imposing mansion is now a retirement residence. It looked pretty good to us!

In modern times this place is often referred to as “Ontario’s prettiest little town,” and we could see the potential on a warm summer day. The two rivers meet at a park in the centre of town where benches invite strollers to sit and enjoy the view. Small boutique shops line the streets. We were tempted to do some Christmas shopping there, but we were interlopers and didn’t want to scare the locals who might fear our potential Toronto Covid germs. So we ate our sandwiches in the car and then headed back down the highway to our clean house, happy to have had such an interesting glimpse of the past.

Sue

As we turn our calendars to the December page and watch winter arriving on our lawns, we are reminded that the annual change of seasons is one reason we all love to live in Canada. Yes, really – we do!

Think of all the excitement! We change our eating habits and get out new menus. No more salads with all that chopping. No more driving to the country farm for fresh corn. No more cleaning the BBQ every night. Instead – comfort food! Hot creamy soups and rich stews with big chunks of beef swimming in thick gravy. That fresh fruit now baked into a warm cobbler with whipped cream on top. A cup of hot chocolate or apple cider served with roasted chestnuts in front of a crackling fire. Yum!

Then there is our “new” wardrobe. We put away our shorts and tee shirts, clothes we wore for the last several months, that no longer fit due to all the extra snacking. Instead we think of snuggling into that big turtleneck bought on sale last February. Top it off with a (fake) fur-lined coat, that unflattering hat pulled over our ears, and the high boots with the tire tread. It’s a whole new look!

Our activities change too. Since we’re sick of walking on the same trails, we can put on snow shoes and travel into forests and other out-of-the-way places. We can go skating on recently-opened ice rinks. And, with golf courses closed down, we can ski across the fairways and check out the view from the tee boxes. For even more exercise – we can shovel the driveway!

December also gives us everybody’s favourite season – Christmas. Despite the pandemic, there are many things to celebrate about Christmas. First off, we get to decorate our houses differently. Add a welcoming wreathe to our boring front doors. Put some scented pine boughs on the mantle. Find that dancing Santa and feature him on the dining room table. Add twinkly lights everywhere. Hide those indoor plants and bring in the Christmas tree!

During a pandemic our Christmas cards are going to be more important than ever. When we check our mailboxes, we’ll find something better than ads for duct cleaning and real estate. And those personal messages will warm everyone’s heart. As for gifts – we can still go shopping online, something we are all accustomed to by now. We can help our local business as well. Browse their online catalogues and choose the perfect gifts for everyone on our list. During covid this is pretty easy: books, sports equipment (with thermal underwear), or chocolate are all good because they give people something to do.

Visiting with family and friends during the holidays? Well, unfortunately that’s a tough call this year, and options are extremely limited. We still have Zoom. Or drive-bys where we wave from the car windows while throwing unbreakable gifts onto the driveway. OR… well my husband Peter and I have been looking at our garage/party room again. What? You don’t want to read about us putting up the white plastic sheets for the 3rd time, even if we decorate them with red bows? Well we don’t want to do it either! Last time it was chilly in there, even with the heater. Think of how frosty it might be on December 25th!

As we figure out these challenges, we all need to stay safe so we can celebrate Christmas properly next year. Meanwhile, if you have any Christmas thoughts or suggestions, send them along.

Sue

As we try to survive another lockdown, we’ll be looking once again to our new best friend, Zoom, to help us through.

Zoom and other online connection platforms are not the only new technologies ready to help us with distractions throughout this time of isolation. Take the recently developed shower head with a built-in speaker. It gives you up to 7 hours of music via Bluetooth, so you can sing while you are soaping up. That’s extra practice time for your new singing career! You can also connect to other speakers in your home so that family members in another room can sing along. Fortunately there is no camera involved.

Then there is the trendy new vacuum, Roomba, which vacuums your whole house and replaces your cleaning lady who might have covid germs. But consider my husband Peter’s recent purchase, meant to scare away the squirrels and skunks who are digging up the lawn. A black box called Yard Gard, it operates on a high-frequency signal which scares the creatures away. Then we realized we had nothing to watch in the back yard! So we sent it back.

But, as the dark winter looms, without even the joy of a family Christmas to plan for, we need more than just singing and animals to distract us. We need mental health support! Online courses provide some relief, and there are many options.

Blog readers talk about book clubs, exercise classes, and bridge lessons online. Other readers tell us about lecture series that cover many different topics, from art to history to science. These courses and lectures are especially good if you have your wine and potato chips on your desk. I am even considering an online course in Italian for the winter. If I don’t know the answer to “comme stai?” I can turn off my camera and pretend I went to the bathroom.

Do these platforms work perfectly? Not really. Peter and I took part in our university 50th reunion online recently. It was informative but it wasn’t personal. Many beloved classmates weren’t there, and opportunities to chat were limited. Nothing replaces that face-to-face meeting where we can see smiles and other body language. And of course wrinkles. Then we can ask ourselves, “How did those Other people get so old?”

A while ago Peter and I tried to turn a Zoom performance into a face-to-face meeting, and we got into trouble. We had been invited to watch a performance of a grand daughter who was taking an online acting course. We eagerly signed onto the Zoom platform, a new experience for us. And there, on the screen, were the Other grandparents, people we know quite well, all the way over in New Zealand! Without thinking, we waved frantically and called out to them in very loud voices: “Hi over there! How are you doing??”

Almost immediately our phone rang. It was Peter’s daughter telling us to “mute” our mic NOW because we were ruining the performance for everyone else. Oops! Where was that mute button anyway?

Sometimes we oldies are not to be trusted with technology, even during a pandemic.

Sue

Celebrating special events during a pandemic is tough. Never mind Easter, Thanksgiving and Hallowe’en, which will all happen again next year. What about milestone birthdays, once in a lifetime?

We have had several of these in our family during the last 8 months. This means that everyone is getting older, which beats the alternative, and we have figured out small ways to celebrate. Gift drop-offs with clapping, outdoor picnics in parks, and garage gatherings; all indicate that at least the event has not gone unnoticed. Honouring a 75th birthday was our latest challenge.

Some parts of this celebration were easy to arrange. Gifts for my particular 75-year-old, aka Peter, are not hard to find. He is one of a generation of men who seem to feel that clothes don’t matter. Wear that holey shirt to the store? Who will notice? Put on worn-out suit pants to do the gardening? Why not? Old shoes that are scuffed and leaking? Perfect for cleaning out the garage! “Reduce, re-use, recycle” is their motto and it is mostly a good one.

In a perfectly timed request the other day, Peter asked me to mend his hiking pants. “Just a tiny hole” he said. It was not exactly tiny and it was not on a seam, so it couldn’t really be mended in the usual way. I got out an iron-on patch. Oops – it seems the hiking pants were made out of a material that melts and the “tiny” hole was now Huge. I hid the pants and thought about what to do. Then one of the “kids” called, asking for birthday gift ideas. Phew – saved!!

Setting up the garage for a family drop-in was easy too. I still had the plastic sheets left over from the last garage party and they transformed the space into a festive banquet hall. Well that may be a slight exaggeration, but I did add balloons to cover up the gaps between the sheets. And we got a new, heavy-duty heater. We were ready for the masked guests to arrive, one family at a time.

Nine-year-old Agnes and her parents came in the morning, wearing warm coats and bearing a birthday cake which Agnes had baked herself. It was a tasty work of art and we made a huge dent in it. They also brought new hiking pants as a gift. Yea! After an hour they were getting cold and it was time to leave. We waved good-bye from a distance and went inside to wait for the next guests.

In the afternoon Peter’s 2 other sons arrived separately, with our other grandchildren and 2 dogs. They all had jackets on (although the dogs forgot theirs). We sat across from one another and tried to stay warm as the winds howled outside and the darkness moved in. We watched Peter open more gifts: a warm sweater with a sheepskin lining, and a box with 2 merino wool hats. How useful! He quickly stashed them behind his chair.

Gradually everyone got up and started moving to keep warm. It was difficult trying to dance around one another while staying 2 meters apart. Eventually even the heater, the hot apple cider, and the jackets were not enough. Fearing for the safety of his new sweater and hats, Peter suggested it was time for the party to end. As the shivering guests headed for the warmth of their cars, we all agreed that it was a birthday we would remember for a long time.

But it’s getting harder to imagine a Christmas in the garage with the snow blowing in. We’ll have to add another feature to our party venue. If anyone sees red blankets on sale at a good price, can you let me know? I’ll need several.

Sue

When my husband Peter and I moved from the country to the city a couple of years ago, one of our reasons for moving was so that we would have more to do. We didn’t know then that we would be doing it during a pandemic.

These times are testing our ability to be creative, to find new and interesting things to keep us active and engaged. That challenge is definitely easier in the good weather. Think how wonderful the last few days have been. With the sun shining and the breezes warming our faces, those long walks and patio lunches filled our souls with joy. But can we keep doing that during the colder months? I think we can!

The busy main street in our neighbourhood has been growing outdoor patios for the last couple of months. They are sprouting up all over the road, separated from noisy cars whizzing past by only a small fence and a concrete abutment; not really conducive to conversation or fine dining. But there are some ingenious restauranteurs who have branched out. One pub owner created a patio out of a back-door parking lot by building an arbor and covering it with fake vines . Another high-end restaurant owner climbed up his stairs to the roof and voila – a “high”-end patio! These places need only add some outdoor heaters and their season can extend through November at least.

On two of our recent walks, Peter and I came across a couple of other patio gems. One day we drove to a parking area near Ontario Place, and walked around the grounds. We spent a couple of hours reminiscing about the good old days when Ontario Place was open and we visited with our young families, taking in concerts, movies in the Cinesphere, and the beach on Lake Ontario. These days the buildings are closed but the grounds are open, and some washrooms too.

After wandering around, we headed north through the deserted CNE grounds and up towards a street that would take us back to our car. There, unexpectedly, we came across a patio. It was in a large sunken courtyard with tables well-distanced, and there were heaters near each table. The aroma was enticing and suddenly we were starving. Well not Third World starving, just hungry. We spent a very enjoyable hour eating a late brunch and staying warm at the Big Rock Brewery.

On another adventure we set out to explore Corktown. This is an area in the south-east end of the city which was the original landing place of settlers from County Cork, Ireland, or so the story goes. This part of the city seems to be the original Toronto settlement: the very first parliament buildings of Upper Canada were situated here until they burned down, one after another, three times. Part of the land is on the Don River floodplain, so building there is forbidden. Instead, a wonderful new park was created in 2013. Walking trails, fountains, a children’s playground, all fit into the gently rolling hills of Corktown Commons.

There were a number of industries here too, built during the 1800’s, mostly related to the distillery business. And so we now have – The Distillery District. And guess what? Lots of patios! Peter and I wandered along the streets, inspecting them and trying to decide where to sit. We settled on El Catrin, a Mexican place. The food was excellent, and the heating was extensive. A huge fire pit in the centre of the patio radiated heat out to the nearby diners. Above each table a dual-purpose chandelier sent heat downwards. And as back-up there were several electric heaters on stand-by. We were toasty warm as we ate our tacos.

These visits have given us hope. if we could find two patio treasures like these without really trying, there must be more. Are there enough to get us through to Spring? We’ll find out!

Sue

One

What is the most blah month of the year? Well, unless somebody wants to grow a moustache, my vote goes to November.

By the end of October Hallowe’en is done. This year was a non-event. We had only 8 kids drop by for candy, compared to other years where we have had up to 90 little spidermen and witches at our door. There were fewer decorations in the neighbourhood, although a couple of nearby homeowners came up with clever, covid-inspired, lawn creations. (See below)

Because of social distancing, and because kids are back in school now with new bubbles of classmates, we decided to send our grandchildren Halloween candy by mail. The candies cost about 50 cents each, and the 4 envelopes were $1.25. The postage? $46.00!!! Next time we’ll drive to each house and throw the candies in the driveway. And now we are up against November, with NO official holidays.

By November the sun is a dim bulb in the sky. All the leaves have fallen, their brilliant colours reduced to wrinkled brown, and the only thing left to do is hope that a strong wind will blow them to the neighbours’ properties. Last year we relied on the city’s leaf pick-up plan. Just rake them to the curb, and an amazing vacuum will come along and suck them all up. Except that last year it didn’t. So Peter had to bag them after all. On top of the leaf piles growing larger, the days are growing shorter and the bedroom is growing colder. Time to put the duvet on the bed and hide underneath.

In past Novembers we have travelled to somewhere warm to escape. Last year we went to the Galapagos Islands for hiking, snorkeling, and kayaking. It was fantastic. Even the bad parts – getting up at 5:00 am, falling out of the kayak onto the dock while the crew laughed, eating unknown but still wriggling fish – were better than staying home. This year the covid numbers are rising world-wide and the only travel options are videos and albums.

And no matter the outcome, tonight’s election will change our television viewing habits. With any luck there will be no more watching all the lies and deceit that have left us gobsmacked for the past four years. With any luck, Donald J. Trump will be moving somewhere far away like Russia. But, if he wins, we’ll be turning off CNN forever. Either way, we’ll be facing a new world south of the border. And right now the prospect is dark and sombre, just like the month ahead.

Meanwhile there is One good thing about November, for our family. We have 2 family birthdays coming up. Our son Greg and my husband Peter both have birthdays, and Peter’s is a Big one! So next week I’ll be back out in the garage setting up the patio furniture, hanging up those plastic sheets, and trying to make the garage look festive.

During this cold dark month we need diversions! We have to keep going somehow. So next week I plan to write about outdoor patios that are set up for safe November dining. A walk followed by some good, hot, food is just the thing to deal with lethargy. If you have any patio suggestions, please send them along.

Sue

In preparation for my post this morning, I re-read last year’s post about Thanksgiving. Last October we invited 18 family members for dinner, I bought a huge TOM Turkey which I had trouble lifting into the car, and then I read a magazine article titled “How to Host the Perfect Thanksgiving” which I followed exactly, of course. That was only 12 months ago, but how the world has changed since then!

For this year’s Thanksgiving: instead of 18 guests, my husband Peter and I had just ourselves, and a few short back-yard family visits. Instead of striving for perfection, I was striving for survival. And in addition to TOM, we had Venus. Venus is my son’s big dog and she has trouble getting into cars too. She came to visit while my son and daughter-in-law went on a short vacation.

Venus is a little puppy in an adult dog’s body. She spent her time running from the living room, where she had a dog-height window from which to view passing pedestrians (and one racoon), to the back porch, where she could stalk the neighbour’s cat, Minou. Back and forth, back and forth she went, her routine only interrupted when I “stole” her ball. This squeaky orange orb with spikes looks amazingly like a covid germ. She carries it around, stopping only to squeak it if she is stressed. It’s like her security blanket, her worry beads.

Another thing we did was go for walks, twice a day. I had no idea there were so many dogs in our new neighbourhood. I counted 11 on one walk alone. As all dog-walkers know, it’s best to avoid one another because dogs have a different sense of which other dogs are OK to meet. Venus can spot a yappy, mouse-like creature and it’s love at first sight. Or she can come across an adorable male specimen and growl as if he’s a terrorist. Venus checked out all the other options on our walks, but not one was suitable. Instead she wanted to go home to see TOM.

TOM was the highlight of Venus’s visit. He was huge and she was impressed that we went to such expense just for her. She watched intently as I stuffed him and put him in the roasting pan. She hung around the kitchen salivating for 4 hours while he roasted up. Then Peter and I sat down to eat our quiet Thanksgiving dinner, making small talk while Venus waited nearby. Her contributions to the conversation were grunts and snorts, indicating that her patience was running thin.

After dinner, we sliced TOM up and gave some to Venus. She “gobbled” every mouthful. Then she spent the rest of the evening lying on the living room rug, doing turkey toots. Very rude, I thought.

Meanwhile Peter and I made up 5 packages of meat, stuffing, gravy; one for each of our “kids.” On Saturday Venus went home, accompanied by her parents and one of the packages tucked safely under the front seat. The other families made arrangements to drop by on Sunday or Monday, sit in the back yard, socially distanced for 1/2 an hour, and then pick up their Turkey To Go.

Today the house seems lonely. No more family visits, no holiday excitement, and no Venus running back and forth, squeaking her ball, or checking under the table for turkey bits. It’s going to be a long winter… Does anybody have a dog we can borrow?

Sue

These days, with summer giving way to autumn and the daylight hours shrinking by the minute, we are hearing other bad news too. The pandemic is in a second wave. How are we going to fill all the dark cold hours that lie ahead?

One thing everyone is doing a lot more of is…No I’m not talking about baking, or walking, or watching the latest Trump fiasco. Something more cerebral – reading! Newspapers, best-selling novels, magazines, even store ads – all are flying off the shelves during these lonely times. We crave an escape, away from our worries and into another world where we can find somebody or something else to think about.

But not everyone has access to decent print material. Children, especially in low-income families, are deprived. Store-bought books are expensive, regular schooling is not available to everyone, and libraries have limited access. So how to help? One day I was walking past a local church and I saw a long line of people waiting, some of them with kids beside them and wagons trailing behind. I soon discovered that it was a Food Bank. And it was really busy. But those kids dragging along; they seemed bored. They needed a book!

A few phone calls later an idea was born. “Get reading! Food For the Brain!” After we got the OK from the Food Bank and a place to hand out books to kids, we needed the books. I mentioned this idea to some friends, many of them YOU dear readers! Soon I had people cleaning out cupboards, searching in basements, and dropping off books, lots of them. One family actually donated 97 books, most of them nearly new.

Meanwhile I contacted the library next to the church, and the librarian said my call was timely; they were culling their shelves and would be happy to donate the children’s books. Otherwise the books would be going into recycling. What a shame! A few days later the librarian called back to say the books were ready for pick-up. Did I have a car? A Big car? Oh oh…..

I conscripted my dear husband Peter and we took his SUV to the library. There on the curb were bags and bags of books. We estimated about 250 books in total. They were in good shape too! We drove them to the church for storage. Samantha, the person who had agreed to take this project on with me, looked a little worried. It seems that the church, like many of us, has a shortage of storage space. We loaded the books into Sam’s office: on the floor, under the side table, and finally onto her desk. She said she would find somewhere else to work.

Next, Sam and I walked around the neighbourhood, putting up flyers on hydro poles, in apartment lobbies, in bus shelters; anywhere we thought the flyers would be seen by people who used food banks. The flyer announced the day the project would start – September 23. We hoped that at least a few families would take advantage. We really needed to unload all those books!

Well I am happy to say that, in the first week we gave out about 50 books. The second week was just as good. A few children showed up and were delighted to pick out their own book, but it was mostly parents choosing for their child. They had special requests too. “My son hates reading but do you have any books on basketball?” “My daughter Loves unicorns. Are there any unicorn books?” And a scary one: “I don’t have any kids, but do you have any adult books?” Oops…if we took on adult books, Sam would have to move out of her office entirely.

I went home feeling pretty upbeat about all this, despite the work involved. Then the librarian called again to say they had more books available, another 250 at least. Yikes! It seems we may have created a pandemic monster! A literate one at least.

Sue

PS No picture due to technical difficulties. Go read a book instead!